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■ :-"' .'-" , Carrion—n. Dead and decaying flesh. The Vol. 62 No. 10,000,000 served </0., (ji < \4.! 9 April! 987 Freshmen, sophomores dejected; Refused on-campus housing Professors crack down on in-class behavior by Kyle Lennart Olund To control the problem with parking on campus, security has proposed a bill to the Board of Regents that will reduce the amount of cars being driven to school. The bill, unofficially called "F&SDDTS" will ban freshman and sophomores from driving to school. "We've tried about everything to try and tame the parking problem," says Supervisor of Security Andrew Saterdalen. "We've just about used up all of our tickets. It takes too much time to write them, also; so this seems like the bill that will settle all problems." Only in special cases will underclassmen be able to have cars on campus. In order to be permitted to have a car on campus, freshmen and sophomores will need to get a note from their employer, both parents (or two guardians), President Brushaber, Physical Plant director Jim Woods, and Night Security/ Custodian Queen Harris. "I know students will complain," says Woods, "but it really is the most sensible thing to do. They'll get used to it." Bethel is not the only school to ban underclassmen from having cars on campus. St. Olaf, as well as other schools have had to pass a bill such as the one Security is trying to get passed. The Board of Regents will vote on the bill sometime in late July. by Miss American Pie The Bethel College faculty, in a Spring Break session called for by popular demand of 80% of the faculty, voted unanimously to make an amendment to the recently revised policy which changed the grading scale. In addition to the already harsh requirements for passing, the faculty determined that class attendance and participation were mandatory for successful completion of a class. Under the new policy, to go into effect next fall, students will be required to attend every class session, with no exception, regardless of extenuating circumstances. Dr. Neil Reformation, Professor of Capitalism in the Modern World, stated the consequences of a student missing class. "Failure lo be at each and every session will result in an automatic failure of the class. We work hard to provide these kids- with a decent education, and if they don't have the common courtesy to come and hear us, then we'll show them who's boss." Dr. Chewoo, Instructor in Evangelical Heresies, shared Reformation's philosophy. "If students cannot get themselves to class, then we don't owe them a thing. We've got a hierarchy here, and we want to make it very clear that if they mess with us, they'll pay." Although the penalties are harsh, many Bethel students do not seem to object to the new policy. Banana Guftufson, senior cross-stitch major, finds the amendment a wonderful addition. "It's about time Bethel cracked down on us. They let us get away with far too much. If we're going to succeed out there in the real world, we've got to learn some good discipline while we're here. I only wish I were going to be here to enjoy the rigors of this new policy." Junior Oinkie Golden-Bee, double majoring in Male Dominance and Female Submission, agrees with roommate Guftufson. "I think it's an important step for Bethel. We, need to know that there are consequences for our actions. If we can't be responsible and obedient to those in authority over us, we will fail in life." Golden-Bee continued, "I know I will have no problem with it as a girl, but I can foresee some problems in trying to make the guys obey the female teachers—there's something just not right about that." The amendment also includes a class participation requirement. It states: "Every student will, under penalty of immediate failure of the class and threat of expulsion if the practice continues, speak a I least two times during each class period." Realizing that keeping track of such participation might hinder effective teaching, professors will have a Discipline Assistant in each class they instruct to handle this monitor ing. Grant monies from the Association for the Subordination and Unquestioning Obedience of Evangelical Students will provide the funds for the D.A.s. The faculty is excited at the potential of this policy. Professor of Uncertainty in Leisure Reading Dan "the beard" Taylor, who will be leading a study tour of Iowa's literary shrines next fall, admitted, "Personally, I get kind of tired of hearing my own voice for an hour. You know, too much of a good thing!" Pebbles McNeel, Proof-reading Center coordinator and Teacher of Dick and Jane Readers, believes that the requirement will force students to prepare their work. "We needed a policy like this a long time ago. The only way to get these kids to learn is to shove it down their throats. All we're looking for is for them to spit back what we tell them. I think that's the essence of education." . The amendment of required class attendence and participation will strengthen the newly instated grading policy, which sets the A range at 98-100%, and the failing mark at 79% and below, according to Son of Carl, Lecturer in Why Communism Works. "We've got to get away from this weak kneed idea of grace. We've become far too human in our policies here at Bethel, and I'm glad that we as a faculty have opened our eyes to that danger and made an about-face." Advisory Board revokes freedom to dance NBA superstar Karen Callahan {#25} skies high to block a shot by World B. Free, (story see p. 12) photo by Ansel Adams by Sue Schafer The Bethel Advisory Board met over spring break and have decided to reinstate the no dance policy. As students are well aware, the discretionary dance policy was implemented on a trial basis. After the midterm grades were posted, students' marks lowered from a previous average of 2.75 to 2.4. These results have the board concerned. One professor of the philosophy department said that students do not only dance on the weekend but also during weeknights. This makes their quality of homework deteriorate because not as much time is being put into it. Chapel attendance and campus activities stump the advisory committee. Students lack of interest toward chapel is a key reason for the no dance policy to be put back in effect. Campus activities also show that few students are involved. John Bremseth stated, "No one goes to school activities because they have all gone dancing." As far as lower grades is a problem, he laughs, "I think it is the Freshmen." Students have shown anger towards the advisory boards meeting. A frantic Jodene Rippe said, "I like dancing. I don't go that often, but they cannot change the policy. Can they?" Well Jodene, to answer your question, "yes they can. That's the Bethel way." Sophomore Brent Murphy began, "if they are going to have dancing, wouldn't on-campus be the best? That way they can regulate it. Although bars are not appropriate they are the fun places to dance." "Brent, I agree! If dancing is okay, it is okay on or off campus, not one or the other." Logic tells me the reason dancing will not be organized on-campus is because if they encourage dancing the founders will no longer support Bethel financially. The board realizes that students cannot use discretion when the only place to dance is at bars. Since they refuse to promote dancing on-campus, it will be prohibited before the Fall Semester. With a strict life-style statement, including no dancing, the board will encourage more campus activities in order to build Bethel's unit.
Object Description
Description
Title | Page 1 |
Alternative Title | The Bethel Carrion |
Edition (Vol. No.) | Vol. 62 No. 16 |
Date Published | April 09 1987 |
Decade | 1980 |
Academic Year | 1986 - 1987 |
Frequency | Weekly |
Notes | The Carrion (April Fools Edition of the Clarion) typically contains jokes, satire, and comic writing. As such, "normal" credits, dates, volume/number and other information should not be taken at face value. This project has been financed in part with funds provided by the State of Minnesota through the Minnesota Historical Society from the Arts and Cultural Heritage Fund. |
Digital Collection | The Clarion: Bethel University's Student Newspaper |
Digital Publisher | Bethel University |
Editor | Bothersome, Ninn |
Contributors | Olundm Kyle Lenfart (Associate Editor); Ritch, Danny (News Editor); Asco, Alvin (Sports Editor); Stenchland, Becky (Feature Editor); Eastman, Jorge (Photo Editor); Bidnis, Mike "Power Hungry" (Business Manager); Kix, Maverick (Ad Manager); Stick, Helen (Production Manager); Mort, Saul (Copy Editor); Blockhead, Joe (Graphics); But, Julie A. (Columnist); Hawk, Dave Tom (Columnist); ChrissyHerring (Emeritus); Achoo, Keven (Photographer); Cole, Black S. (Staff Writer); Muffin, Lori (Staff Writer); Leonard, Marvin (Staff Writer); Spam (Staff Writer); Christ, Sue J. (Staff Writer); Tammy, Peepin' (Staff Writer); Heinous, Rach E. (Staff Writer); Bozon, Gretchen (Staff Writer); Bozo, Helga (Staff Writer); Paulson, Don (Staff Writer); Dimsight, John (Staff Writer); Crime, Judith (Staff Writer); Lee, Kaybee (Production) |
Location |
United States Minnesota Saint Paul |
Time Span of Publication | Newspaper published from 1921 through present day |
Copyright | Reproduction or distribution of these files is permitted for educational and research purposes with proper attribution to the Bethel Digital Library. No commercial reproduction or distribution of these files is permitted under copyright law without the written permission of Bethel University Digital Library. For questions or further information on this collection, contact digital-library@bethel.edu. |
Type | text |
Format | image/jpeg |
Physical Dimensions | 11.5 x 14.5 |
Original Collection | Printed paper copies of original newspaper in the collections of the Bethel University Library and the History Center: Archives of the Baptist General Conference and Bethel University. |
Original Publisher | Bethel College |
Transcript | ■ :-"' .'-" , Carrion—n. Dead and decaying flesh. The Vol. 62 No. 10,000,000 served 0., (ji < \4.! 9 April! 987 Freshmen, sophomores dejected; Refused on-campus housing Professors crack down on in-class behavior by Kyle Lennart Olund To control the problem with parking on campus, security has proposed a bill to the Board of Regents that will reduce the amount of cars being driven to school. The bill, unofficially called "F&SDDTS" will ban freshman and sophomores from driving to school. "We've tried about everything to try and tame the parking problem," says Supervisor of Security Andrew Saterdalen. "We've just about used up all of our tickets. It takes too much time to write them, also; so this seems like the bill that will settle all problems." Only in special cases will underclassmen be able to have cars on campus. In order to be permitted to have a car on campus, freshmen and sophomores will need to get a note from their employer, both parents (or two guardians), President Brushaber, Physical Plant director Jim Woods, and Night Security/ Custodian Queen Harris. "I know students will complain," says Woods, "but it really is the most sensible thing to do. They'll get used to it." Bethel is not the only school to ban underclassmen from having cars on campus. St. Olaf, as well as other schools have had to pass a bill such as the one Security is trying to get passed. The Board of Regents will vote on the bill sometime in late July. by Miss American Pie The Bethel College faculty, in a Spring Break session called for by popular demand of 80% of the faculty, voted unanimously to make an amendment to the recently revised policy which changed the grading scale. In addition to the already harsh requirements for passing, the faculty determined that class attendance and participation were mandatory for successful completion of a class. Under the new policy, to go into effect next fall, students will be required to attend every class session, with no exception, regardless of extenuating circumstances. Dr. Neil Reformation, Professor of Capitalism in the Modern World, stated the consequences of a student missing class. "Failure lo be at each and every session will result in an automatic failure of the class. We work hard to provide these kids- with a decent education, and if they don't have the common courtesy to come and hear us, then we'll show them who's boss." Dr. Chewoo, Instructor in Evangelical Heresies, shared Reformation's philosophy. "If students cannot get themselves to class, then we don't owe them a thing. We've got a hierarchy here, and we want to make it very clear that if they mess with us, they'll pay." Although the penalties are harsh, many Bethel students do not seem to object to the new policy. Banana Guftufson, senior cross-stitch major, finds the amendment a wonderful addition. "It's about time Bethel cracked down on us. They let us get away with far too much. If we're going to succeed out there in the real world, we've got to learn some good discipline while we're here. I only wish I were going to be here to enjoy the rigors of this new policy." Junior Oinkie Golden-Bee, double majoring in Male Dominance and Female Submission, agrees with roommate Guftufson. "I think it's an important step for Bethel. We, need to know that there are consequences for our actions. If we can't be responsible and obedient to those in authority over us, we will fail in life." Golden-Bee continued, "I know I will have no problem with it as a girl, but I can foresee some problems in trying to make the guys obey the female teachers—there's something just not right about that." The amendment also includes a class participation requirement. It states: "Every student will, under penalty of immediate failure of the class and threat of expulsion if the practice continues, speak a I least two times during each class period." Realizing that keeping track of such participation might hinder effective teaching, professors will have a Discipline Assistant in each class they instruct to handle this monitor ing. Grant monies from the Association for the Subordination and Unquestioning Obedience of Evangelical Students will provide the funds for the D.A.s. The faculty is excited at the potential of this policy. Professor of Uncertainty in Leisure Reading Dan "the beard" Taylor, who will be leading a study tour of Iowa's literary shrines next fall, admitted, "Personally, I get kind of tired of hearing my own voice for an hour. You know, too much of a good thing!" Pebbles McNeel, Proof-reading Center coordinator and Teacher of Dick and Jane Readers, believes that the requirement will force students to prepare their work. "We needed a policy like this a long time ago. The only way to get these kids to learn is to shove it down their throats. All we're looking for is for them to spit back what we tell them. I think that's the essence of education." . The amendment of required class attendence and participation will strengthen the newly instated grading policy, which sets the A range at 98-100%, and the failing mark at 79% and below, according to Son of Carl, Lecturer in Why Communism Works. "We've got to get away from this weak kneed idea of grace. We've become far too human in our policies here at Bethel, and I'm glad that we as a faculty have opened our eyes to that danger and made an about-face." Advisory Board revokes freedom to dance NBA superstar Karen Callahan {#25} skies high to block a shot by World B. Free, (story see p. 12) photo by Ansel Adams by Sue Schafer The Bethel Advisory Board met over spring break and have decided to reinstate the no dance policy. As students are well aware, the discretionary dance policy was implemented on a trial basis. After the midterm grades were posted, students' marks lowered from a previous average of 2.75 to 2.4. These results have the board concerned. One professor of the philosophy department said that students do not only dance on the weekend but also during weeknights. This makes their quality of homework deteriorate because not as much time is being put into it. Chapel attendance and campus activities stump the advisory committee. Students lack of interest toward chapel is a key reason for the no dance policy to be put back in effect. Campus activities also show that few students are involved. John Bremseth stated, "No one goes to school activities because they have all gone dancing." As far as lower grades is a problem, he laughs, "I think it is the Freshmen." Students have shown anger towards the advisory boards meeting. A frantic Jodene Rippe said, "I like dancing. I don't go that often, but they cannot change the policy. Can they?" Well Jodene, to answer your question, "yes they can. That's the Bethel way." Sophomore Brent Murphy began, "if they are going to have dancing, wouldn't on-campus be the best? That way they can regulate it. Although bars are not appropriate they are the fun places to dance." "Brent, I agree! If dancing is okay, it is okay on or off campus, not one or the other." Logic tells me the reason dancing will not be organized on-campus is because if they encourage dancing the founders will no longer support Bethel financially. The board realizes that students cannot use discretion when the only place to dance is at bars. Since they refuse to promote dancing on-campus, it will be prohibited before the Fall Semester. With a strict life-style statement, including no dancing, the board will encourage more campus activities in order to build Bethel's unit. |
Language | English |
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